Pain Had become My old companion

They said that pain is a very important receptor in our body. If somewhere in our body feels pain, it is telling us that particular area is in danger. Like when we feel pain when we accidentally cut our finger, Our reflex action will pull our hand away. Or maybe we felt stomach pain, we will know something is wrong with it. So much so for pain. Acts like a first warning sign of dangers that are yet to come or coming. But what if we are having pain and we can't do anything about it? Like washing your wound everyday in order to keep it clean. Today I had a bad time at Jasniah clinic. I m not sure why but today washing the wound from my fistualactomy surgery was painful. But i just continued the procedure, bearing with the pain. its like pain had been a long companinion for me since my first abcess history while working as a waiter at polywata. its like pain had been my long companion. Don't know when only will this all end for good. Really hope i can stay healthy till I become old. I really cannot take anymore of this.
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Dear, I so wish that you are with me now. Hugging me. But I know you have to study for your exam. I wish you all the best. And you told me you didn't do well in your exam yesterday? Oh my gosh..... Dear dear, somehow i felt i have to take some responsibilty for you not doing well.... I m not sure, but, Please study hard for your finals. I hope that we can still focus on our work eventhough we have a relationship to maintain. How to make sure you will love me more and at the same time study? By the way, dear, if you didn't do well for your mid term, don't think about it already.... Its over so don't worry about it already. Just focus on your coming coursework like quizes and assignments and the final exam. Eventhough you flop your mid term. don't be sad, as you can always bounce back. I am a very good example. Speaking frankly, I had failed many midterms in my beta year. But i was always able to bounce back in finals and get a good grade in the end. Becoz I always start to pick-up and pump toward the finals. Baby, don't worry yea. everything is going to be alright. First year degree students usually will have abit of difficulties to catch up. But dont worry. As you progress, things will become more like a routine which you will eventually get used to it, and will be able to cope. I hope you can continue to be happy with time spend with me and also do well to a satisfactory level academically. Lao Ban wish you all the best madam. Love hard and Study Harder. That is my beloved Grace madam. ^^