Toughts

Is Caring for someone the same with loving someone? Does It mean If you care for someone means you love her/him? And also does it mean that if you love someone then only you can care for him/her? When people say loving someone is not an easy thing to do.... Maybe I still Dont know how to love other people yet.... Thats why these few days always have some toughs... I want to be a good person to everyone. Not just to certain specific group. But in reality, its really more difficult said than done. Some people are just not worthy of you treating them good, While some, you cant be too good to them due to many abstract constrains. Real life and reality is really cruel sometimes. I never believe in fate but sometimes, I do really feel my life's fate is playing a joke on me or giving me too much examinations, one after another. Am I thinking too much? I really wish I can live a quiet and happy life for the next 40-50 years. I had given up a lot of earlier ambitions, because unachievable ambitions will always make us regret and sad. I want to live a happy and healthy life. That is all I m asking if God really exists.

By the way, I had just realized that I had almost stayed in Ixora B-2-8 bed6 for almost 2 years now. Time flies soo fast. I still remember the last time I moved in. I was so free, with nothing to do and i really love this place very much. As 2years gone by, I had decided that this semester will be the last time I will be staying here. There are many reasons why I wanted to move out. cheaper rental, already starting to be bored with Ixora and etc. But the main 2 reasons is I want to stay alone in one room, no room mates. I m not a guy who can stay with strangers. I still remember what take5 told me a few weeks before we all leave for university 3 years ago. He said that we can never get a roommate that we like and can tolerate living with, because there will be no chance you can meet a person with the same attitude and similarities with you. There for, there will always be some friction in the room. Not happily ever after. I just realized the truth in his saying a couple months back. Thats why I hope to be able to experience living alone in my final year. Owning the room alone, in charge of my own sanctuary.

Next reason is because its really hard to bring my girlfriend over my place in Ixora. I understand why they need male and female segregation even though i think its a stupid Malaysian culture. When i dont have girlfriend yet, this segregation thing has done no impact on me at all. But now, Its really hard to find some private space where I can have some private moments with my girl. Stupid people especially "them" will say its a bad thing to do, You should not do anything to a girl until you are married. I really feel sorry for "them" because they will never be able to experience the beauty of having a romantic and "exciting" time during the courting days. To them is just meet your partner, meet the family, marry. Anyway, talking so much here will not do any good as "they" are too stupid and shallow minded to be able to reason my point so close the case. Hope in my final year, I can have more sleep over with her in peace. And can have more dating sessions in my room instead of going out, as i always have to crack my head to think of where to bring her out to. Hahaha.. Low budget date is also another thing.... LOL

By the way, I saw one really cute girl today. She is wearing a specs and her face looks so cute. Her straight hair is really nice too. She reminds me of my old oath. I used to say I want to find a speecky girlfriend cause I had always like Speecky girls. Girls with specs are really cute! Hahahaha.... Anyway, thats what i used to think last time. Now that I have a girlfriend, which dont really wear a specs. ( she wears a glassless glasses occasionally anyway...) I tougth about my old oath and laugh at myself. Eventhough my current girlfriend dont wear a specs, she is really cute and pretty in her own way. Just at times, she make me rather sad and angry, most of the times she really make me happy, and give meaning to my MMU life. Thats what a normal date is all about right? How can there be 24/7 happiness and worry-free relationship?

Grace baby. if you are reading this after you had came back from your japanese class, I think I want to answer your question you asked me long time ago. You asked me before what do I like most about you. I had finally get the answer. I really feel glad I found a girlfriend which gives me time and space to do my own things, not being bossy nor bothering me too much everytime. I really admire your ability to balance between giving me space and caring me at the same time. Not many girls can do that. I think this is the reason why we will be going through our official 1st year anniversary as Official Boyfriend and Girlfriend next week. Too bad we cant celebrate it this year.... sorry...

I always know you will be there for me, no matter what things happen in the future. A girl like you deserve to be bless with happiness, and I hope, sincerely hope you will be happy always for the rest of your life.